I am thankful

I am thankful.   

I am thankful for how much God has taught me this year about loving my family.

I am thankful that my family loves me.

I am thankful for my friends.

I am thankful for the church, with all its imperfections and all its beauty.

I am thankful that God loves me.

I am thankful for the voice of God speaking into my life.

I am thankful that I am learning to listen.

I am thankful for God's discipline.

I am thankful for forgiveness and grace.

I am thankful for second and third chances.

I am thankful for the journey.

I am thankful that this life is only the beginning of the journey.

I am thankful that death is not the end of the journey.

I am thankful that God is in control.

Community (not the brilliant TV show)

Yesterday was the kind of day the reminds me why I love the church so much.  While I am away from my family, and when the timing of our reunion is uncertain, it is the simple act of community in the church that at times keeps me sane and whole and yesterday, from start to finish, was a day of community.
Our entire volunteer team spent time before rehearsal giving thanks together as an act of worship. As our team prayed together and gave thanks together I was reminded of how amazing God is and of how thankful I am for a church that can still find things to be thankful for despite its difficult history.
During our worship time we had ten people from our church body come up and say what they were thankful for.  As these people talked about their thankfulness for God's forgiveness, for family reconciliation, for the love of a husband or wife or children, for the community of the church, for salvation from addiction, I witnessed more people than I can count in tears.  These were not tears of sorrow however, but tears of joy, of happiness, tears that we shared as we saw our own story mirrored in the stories of others in our community, where we all realize we are in this together.
That afternoon our church gathered at a local restaurant for lunch.  Obviously we are too large of a church to all get in to one restaurant at the same time, but over the course of 8 hours, with our missions team acting as servers, our church came together to eat and raise money for our next trip to the mission field of the Dominican Republic in support of our missionaries, Allan and Jackie Perez.  As I sat in the restaurant and ate food with my friends, as I walked from table to table and talked with new friends and caught up with old friends, I was reminded of the power there is in a shared meal.  Eating together is one of the strongest acts of community, which is one of the reasons I love communion so much.  I am eating in community with my eternal community.
In the evening I went to watch football with a family in our church.  I love them.  They have opened up their home to me on countless occasions while I've been down here and have always made me feel like I was part of the family and not some lonely loser with no place to watch football.  Sitting on a couch with dogs jumping on me, yelling at the t.v., discussing the future of the church, telling crazy stories from our pasts (like the time my band played for an outlaw biker rally out in the middle of the Arizona desert), and watching them love their kids the same way I love mine, I was reminded again of why I love this church community so much.
None of us is perfect. None of us are immune to hurt, anger, fear, frustration, stress, or worry. None of us has it all together all the time.  But none of us are alone.  We are surrounded by our community. The way God intended it to be.
Long live the church.    

Sharks

I hate sharks. I've hated them ever since I saw Jaws when I was 10. By accident. Right before I went swimming in the ocean off the side of a boat the came equipped with a "shark spotter" who would ring a really loud bell if there were swimmers in the water and he caught sight of a fin.  I spent the whole day on the side of the boat, too terrified to enter the murky green home of the killer fish.  I still am. Afraid that is.
This fear of sharks is irrational.  I know it.  As long as I stay out of the ocean, and apparently out of some fresh water rivers too now, I won't become a meal for some giant fish with dead eyes and long razor sharp teeth.  My biggest fear would be that I wouldn't become a meal, per se, but rather, just my arm or leg would become the meal.
I can't even being to imagine the fear of swimming along, or paddling along on my surf board (I don't surf obviously) and looking over straight into the eyes of a great white six inches away in the water. Just typing that previous sentence made my heart rate spike.
So, knowing my fear of sharks, my daughter gave me this little present for my office desk when I was home visiting my family last week.
Because I miss her so much, she knew I would take it and put it on my desk as a way to remember her and feel closer to her.  She also knew what it would do to me psychologically.  Apparently she literally wants to "love me to death"

The musical journey of tomorrow

I was home in Canada with my wife and children last week.  What a great week.  While I was there, one of the things I did was to sit down a couple of times and jam with my youngest son Braden. Braden (and his sister Skye) are both legally blind but have never let this stop them or slow them down.  Skye is an amazing artist and Braden has become quite a musician.  Not only does he write/record/produce electronica music (which you can find online along with Skye's art work), but he has also learned to play the bass and the guitar.  And so, just as I did with my dad many years ago, Braden sat down to jam with me this past week.
The boy hears music.  He hears melody.  He writes music.  I love it.
It also reminded me why I love songwriting so much.  It is pure freedom.  I got caught up in trying to write the formula, the hit song, the concise 4 minute song with the right verse/chorus ratio and somewhere in the process forgot the joy of just writing whatever was in my head.
Braden reminded me of that this weekend.  He played melodies and chords and ideas that were in his head and it inspired me.
So, here I am, back in Vegas, sitting at my desk and plugging in my Avid Recording Studio.
I will sit through the tutorial on Pro-Tools.
I will learn how to record vocals and guitar tracks and then how to layer and add bass and drums and keys.
Then I'll probably send it all to Braden and ask him what he would change or do differently.

Then I'll upload it somewhere for whoever cares to hear it.

I might get Skye to do artwork and we'll do our own music videos.

My oldest son Kyle has a very eclectic and very amazing sense of great music too.  This weekend he introduced me to several very cool bands that I would have never heard about if it weren't for him. I think I'll get his opinion on my songs too.

Writing songs again, just for me.  Not for worship, not for church, not for the radio, not for a band, not for the clubs, not for anything other than the joy of exploring a progression or a melody and seeing where it will take me.

...where it will take us.

God Is Not A Priority

We all have priorities.  Not everyone has the same priorities.  The priorities of a politician may be different than the priorities of a stock broker, a police officer, a football player or a mom.  Even beyond the different priorities that encompass different careers, each individual person has their own set of priorities.  Some want to be wealthy, some want to be famous, some want to be educated, some want to be rational, some want to be loved, some want to be left alone, some want to live ethical lives, some want to care for the planet or their families or their pets, and some want to be more spiritual or know God more fully.  A long time ago I decided that it was time to make God a priority in my life.  I had just given my life to Christ after a long period of living for myself and I wanted to make sure that I prioritized my spiritual life.  So I added God to my list of priorities, right along side providing for my family, loving my wife and children, becoming a famous musician, taking care of my health, writing a book, doing post graduate work, vacations, date nights, and the list goes on and on...

What I discovered was this: when I made God a priority he tended to get shuffled...a lot.  I also found that I tended to compartmentalize God.  For instance, this hour is when I will focus on God and my spirituality because the rest of the day is about work and family and school and eating and taking my kids to football.  When I listed all my priorities I began to realize that quite often I made other things a priority over God.  Not because I intended to or wanted to but because I wasn't connected with who God really is and what God really wants for me.

God IS my life.  God is not part of my life.  God is over and in and around and through everything I do each day.  He is not just an hour before breakfast or a few chapters in the Bible before I fall asleep. He is not just prayer before meals or when I need help.  Honestly, if that is all God is, where is he when I sleep in and am late for work or when things are going well and I don't need any desperate help or when I decide to stay up late and watch a movie and then fall asleep and drag myself to bed?  He ends up getting pushed off until tomorrow or until I have more time or am once again faced with a situation I can't handle on my own.  Then God is suddenly a priority again.        

God has to be above priorities because as I discovered, priorities are subject to my control and my desires and my failures and my weaknesses. 

Now I engage in prayer continually as I go throughout my day because I have come to realize that God is with me wherever I am and doesn't need me to set aside quiet time and close my eyes and go into some long formal prayer when I want to talk to Him.  I can talk to him in sentences or phrases or questions as I drive, walk, or in the middle of a difficult conversation with someone and I need His grace.  When things come to mind, I don't need to put them off until my prayer time, I just talk to God about them right then because He is listening, always.  If I choose, I can also carve out time to spend in longer solitude and prayer, but that is not the only way to connect with God.  

I find God in the ordinary, in the everyday, in movies, words, phrases, music, beauty, nature, good food, a great wine, the joy of a good laugh, the community of good friends.  I don't have to wait for that 'sacred' time of devotions or those few verses I read before bed.  God is everywhere in this world, waiting, wanting us to discover Him in new and mysterious ways.

I still try to make time in my day to read the Bible to listen for God speaking to me, for silence and solitude, but I also realize that God is far beyond those times I try, and often fail, to make for Him. And so, with a very keen sense of my own weakness I have come to realize that as long as I try to make God a priority in my life, He will always be shuffled around, no matter how hard I try to keep him the top priority.  God is no longer one of the priorities in my life.  God is my life.  I am trying to see Him in everything I do, in everything I say, in every moment, in the good and the bad, in the successes and the failures.  

Some will no doubt say that this view of my life is about making God a priority, that I have prioritized seeing God in my life every day.  I would agree.  I am prioritizing the attempt to see God as more than a priority.  I know it is confusing, and for some it may just seem like a semantical argument, but for the way God has wired me, it is what makes sense to me.

    

        

 

Finding God in the everyday

Lots of people I know say they find God in the everyday things.  I believe them.  I'd love it if they told me where or how, or if it is just some dumb cliche that people use to excuse their inability or lack of desire to search for God in His word.  Regardless, I do find God in the everyday.
Here are some of the ways I've found God in my everyday life this week.

John Mayer's song "Other Side of Green".  I was listening to it today at the gym.  It contains these lyrics.  "And I don't need another kind of green to know I'm on the right side with you."  So often the grass looks greener on the other side.  Life without the "restrictions" of religion or the perceived inability to have fun if you believe in God can make some people think that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence.  As I listened to the song today I was reminded how true it is that I don't need to go back and try the grass on the other side of the fence, I know I'm on the right side with God.  I love my life with God.  I enjoy my life with God.  I have fun.  I live on His side of the fence.

On the wall of my office is an old Matrix poster.  The tagline is "How far down does the rabbit hole go?"  One of my favorite movies of all time.  In it Morpheus asks Neo if he wants to take the blue pill and continue living in a fairy tale land where nothing is real, or if he wants to take the red pill and discover how far down the rabbit hole goes?  Essentially, if he wants to discover the truth.  Everyday I am reminded that there is no end to what I can discover about my Savior.  There is no end to the rabbit hole, only deeper and deeper levels of understanding and discovery.  The mystery is what keeps me coming back.

The keyboard on my ipad stopped working this week.  I'm not a mac guy so I was frustrated.  I'm downloading manuals from the internet, my wife is downloading manuals, I'm talking with my staff trying to figure it out.  Finally my wife asks me if I have plugged in the keyboard to recharge it.  I didn't know you had to recharge the keyboard separately from the ipad itself.  I was reminded once again as I sat and watched the keyboard recharge yesterday afternoon of how vital it is that I remain plugged in to Jesus and His word.

Now I'm not trying to say that every little thing that happens in life has some giant spiritual significance. Most of the time it probably doesn't.  I'm not suggesting we try to force some spiritual significance into every day living.  Don't waste your day trying to figure out if the water not getting hot in the shower is God's way of trying to tell you something.  What I am saying is this:  be open to the reality that God does speak to us through our everyday lives.  Look for the moments, be open to them.  It may just be a feeling of peace as you watch the sun set.  It may be a feeling of thankfulness as you interact with your kids or our spouse.  God is everywhere.